Messy love life!

Enjoy kissing? Enjoy fucking? What the fuck is happening to me? Simply just kiss someone! And didn't think of the consequences? What the heck!!!!
FHM, just endded, and now comes LCH! And my mind is all about ALCL!fuck fuck fuck!I'm going to exploit! Seriously!I don't wish to go to US now, I just wanna do things i like right now, I don't wanna think of giving hope in the future, no faith!Not even a little!I'm just...... Stuck again again and again, stationary, don't know where to go, should i just be a rock hearted girl, don't fuck care of anyone? To good in flirting? Or it is a bad thing? I really miss him, for his everything, and he told me there is no way that we will back together, right now! I knew it better than anyone else! But u are better in controlling yourself, your emotion and your move! I guess I am not!Which i know this will be a problem in the future, if i keep doing this!dude!change change change!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!