Loneliness lead to these? I should not find LCH, I should not find you back, indeed, i should learn to get use to single life. I don't feel good when you do not find me, but I don't feel good when you find me. A movie on thursday? Is not a problem isn't? I don't think we should back together, I should not give you that hope. But after all, I knew it, you have hope that we both will have chance. Am I selfish? I know I am. Can't be lonely? and I can't take it when you do not want to talk to me, and when you did, i will start taking you for granted.

ALAN LEE CHEA LOON! I do miss you, those feeling is still the same. started to message you, the way you talk to me, I will still smile when reading it. You are selfish, really selfish. When I told you, I don't know what you really want. I am seriously losing faith. But, you tell me you are not. and you can't go soft on me. What does that mean? If I go through it, You will have me in your arm. If I don't, you do not seems like you are craving for me. got ma got la, none ma none la! that is you! and you told me see how we look at things. our perception! you are over protecting, to yourself. 

Happy to see the msg you sent this morning, at least you realize you are selfish, you realize you hurt me don't you? do you know when you do not grab the opportunity, it will just flow away. When that is the time, you will start to regret. 

"After reading ur msg again, i realize that i am selfish! really selfish..I built a layer of protection!2 protect myself from you, a layer that not 2 get hurt,its hard to let go, n not easy to hold you back with me! forgiving u was easiest! after all, im nt even mad..I just want to c that i can hold u and not feeling betrayed!U understand me? I just cant open up myself fully 2 u yet, not now. its not easy 2 gain someone's trust.. do you believe in karma?i think i do!"

I know it is hard to gain trust, especially to make you trust me once more, I don't even know what to do to make you trust me once more, towards u, i need to put double effort to gain your trust. too protective until u will hardly believe in things i said, I know it. even now, i don't think we should get back together, i m not sure am i losing u for now? or for the future. what we can do, is to wait until we both are stable, i'm back from US. and you have your career on! if that the moment we both are still single, we can seriously get marry don't we? thinking too far! ? are u my mr right? and am i your ms right? this the moment we challenge ourself don't we? will you just meet me for the one last time? at least to be back friend and go for a movie? haK! impossible for you isn't? I don't put much hope neither!